first day of school

To put in a brighter note since my last post was a bit dismal...

I get to start school today! Now granted, I've been out of high school for 15 years and have been going to school on and off ever since, so I have a LOT of classes under my belt already. Which is why the classes I'm taking this semester are the last of the prerequisites.

The one starting today is a required class, Business Communications. Basically it'll be teaching me how to do the job that I currently do! I might have been able to get out of it, but there just wasn't enough time for me to work with my boss and put together a portfolio proving it. Who knows, maybe I'll learn something new :)

The class I start next month is actually a refresher for me. Its Medical Terminology, which I've already taken before and got a passing grade in, but since I'm going into the Medical Assisting program for real this time, I figure it'll be better if I have a refresher. Thats an online class though, so it'll be less of a hassle since I'm still trying to work while I go to school.

So yay! I'll post more when I find out more!

I've got it together...

I’ve been feeling pretty good lately!

I feel on track with my future career. I am going to finish school and have this career under my belt. I’m sick of always having something be in the way. Be it class schedules vs. work schedules, or me not being SURE that I’m in the right career path, or me not having the funds to get it moving. I’m sick of waiting for it! I want to be officially doing something that I will enjoy, as my actual job.

And I’m on that path. I start my Business Communications class , which is my final pre-requisite class, next Tuesday, one week from today. I’m also taking a refresher in Medical Terminology (not because I need the class or grade, but because I’d rather have all those terms fresh in my head). I officially start the program this winter, and as long as everything goes on schedule I’ll be finished in June of 2012! Yay!

I feel in control of my Diabetes. I saw my doctor last Wednesday and will be heading in to have my lab work done in a couple of days. Fasting blood work always throws me off because I do better at it if I can do it first thing in the morning. In that regard, I had to wait till a day when we will almost definitely not be busy.

I wasn’t able to get another A1c done because last time I was classified as “in control” because my A1c was under 7%, so my insurance will only cover it after 6 months. I wish I could have known what it was though, since I started the Januvia 2 months ago and the Metformin (again) 3 months ago and I’d like to see how its going. But I guess “in control” is good!

I am also getting the lab work done to see if I have LADA, or type 1.5, or whatever you want to classify it as. If it comes back with positive antibodies, then that’ll be that. At least I will know if I’ll be on insulin forever or if I might be able to come off and just be on pills or nothing.

I’m very happy with my love life. As I posted yesterday, I’m with the man that I know I’m supposed to be with, and plan to be with forever. Even after almost a year and a half, and most of that living in the same place together, I still miss him when I’m not near him, and my heart still flutters when he smiles. I am more content now than I have ever been at any point in my life. Being with Dustin makes me feel safe and warm and fuzzy. :)

So yeah.. I’m doing pretty good, I think :)

too long to wait!

I’ve been thinking a lot about why I’m so antsy to have Dustin propose and to finally get married.

I think part of it is because I feel like I waited too long to get to be with him. Too many issues contributed to me not meeting him until I was already 32 years old. Too many things held onto by hope, when they should have been let go. I feel like I’m just too damn impatient to get into the life I should have been having all this time. I should have been living all these years married to the person that I love more than anything. We should have been together, moving forward with our lives together, not apart. I should have been enjoying my life with him, with a degree already completed and already well into a career, so that even if it HAD taken this long to be ready to have kids, I would be completely ready to have them now.

I don’t feel like I need to tie him into something, or feel worried that I need to get him attached to me quickly, or anything like that. Honestly, I feel so secure in my relationship, and so sure that this is what it will be like forever, that I don’t even feel like I need to be married. But… the traditionalist in me wants to be married before I start a family. And I want to start a family!

Why this pressing need to get moving on this? First, I’m getting to the age where I’ll soon be classified as “too old”… meaning that I move from a high risk group (with Diabetes) to a further high risk group of old people trying to have kids. I don’t actually feel old. Except that I know the old biological clock is ticking away. I feel like my Diabetes is in control. I feel like my life is in order. I want to lose some weight, but I’m hopefully on the right track for that as well.

The only thing throwing me for a little loop is the school thing. I want to be done, but I want kids more. I don’t want to hold off trying to have kids until I’m done because then I might be too late. I can always finish a semester of school if life throws me for a loop. I may not be able to “always” get pregnant.

I may not be able to get pregnant at all for that matter. What if I can’t get pregnant? I will be disappointed, sure. Hugely disappointed. I will wonder if its something I did, or because I waited so long. And I might never know. But I would be comfortable adopting a child as well. So I know that I don’t want to hurry up and get married ONLY to have kids.

I think I’m just excited to be able to say and know that I’m tied to him. Proud to share his name. Happy to be able to stand with him forever, through everything that life might throw at us. Every little thing that could happen, good or bad, will shape our lives together. I just can’t wait to get started!

wasting time...

I recently posted about my geekiness that is World of Warcraft. This is somewhat related... I think...

I'm sitting at work today thinking, wow, there is so much stuff that I want to be doing right now, and this is NOT it. Actually, it kind of is, because I'm typing up this bog post while I'm sitting here and I'll put it up when I get home. But anyway, that's beside the point.

I started thinking about my priorities and how skewed they are in some ways. For example... this is a lit of things I wish I could get out of work and do right now:
1. Play WoW.
2. Shop for stuff to make chainmail.
3. Make chainmail.
4. Watch a movie.
5. Shop for shoes.

This is a list of things I SHOULD be doing if I could get out of work right now:
1. Try to figure out why Michigan Works hasn't called me to tell me that there is money available for the No Worker Left Behind program and that I can finally go to school.
2. Try to figure out when I should start the Medical Assisting program at Macomb, since I think I can pass out of the first semester because I already have the credits.
3. Garden. Trim bushes.
4. Clean the house. Especially vacuum.
5. Grocery shop (mmmmmm tomato basil mozzarella salad). Plan some meals so that the aforementioned grocery shopping is smoother.
** note: why does the grocery shopping need to be smoother?? Who cares how long it takes to grocery shop. I go through this every time. I want to rush in, get stuff, rush out, and then get all upset when it doesn't move that fast... sheesh. I used to wander aimlessly through Meijers for hours just looking at stuff because I was bored.

Anyway... the point here is that if I got out of work right now, I wouldn't do any of that. I would go home and play WoW. And tonight, when I actually DO get out of work, I'm going to play WoW. Which is great since its on the top of my list of things I WANT to do. But... I should be doing other things! I should be doing the things on list #2. I should be relearning how to dance, because I really enjoyed those classes we took last year. I should be planning yummy meals that I can make for next week. I should be going grocery shopping because I REALLY want that tomato basil mozzarella salad (and we're almost out of toilet paper).

And I should REALLY be out walking, and rollerblading, and finding a yoga class, or joining a gym.

And I should REALLY be figuring out the school stuff.

But I'm going to go home and play WoW.

Yay!